Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Day Two...

Blah. Check. Tired. Check. Stressed. Check. Bored. Check.

That about sums up what's going on for me. Sure I could go wander about downtown Kelso, and Longview, but there really isn't that much to see. I've picked up the apartment, made the bed, and checked into internet and cable providers, and I am appalled by how much it costs to have these things installed. Not only does it cost $130 a month for these things, but it is going to cost you $300 just for us to install it for you. Are you serious? I don't think installing cable, internet and phone lines is an art, but I could be wrong. If it was, then maybe I would consider paying that much, but probably not.

My eyes hurt, my head hurts, I feel awful. You know that blah feeling when you do nothing all day. I hate that. I feel like a terrible person. I'm heading home tomorrow to go through more stuff and get stuff for the move ready, so that will be a nice break. Then its back down here again in the evening.

I can't wait till we are all settled and I'm doing something. There is nothing worse than that in between area when I'm stuck trying to get everything done all at once, no one seems to know anything and everything seems so so so expensive. Like I've said previously, I may have a small heart attack soon. I know Josh worries a little bit, but really doesn't let it show, and just denies it anyway. I'm a mess poring over what I can do, and what I have to do to get everything in its rightful place and he seems oblivious to it all. Is that a guy thing? I think so. Well we all know that he is the sane one, and I'm more than a little off my rocker. If it wasn't for him I know I would be much more worse off than I am now. He keeps me in line.

Josh gets home in just under an hour! Have a wonderful day. And don't worry, I won't go completely crazy.


Monday, October 27, 2008

My First Post From Our New Town

Day 1 of being in our new town:

I'm about ready to venture out on my own today to go see what I can find in Kelso and Longview. I've been holed up in this hotel room all morning trying to get caught up on a few things, but still can't post any new pictures on my photo blog or flickr due to the fact that I can't get hooked up to the wireless here at the hotel on my computer. As much as I depend on my computer to do the things I do, I find that I want to throw it out the window most days. I've witheld so far, thinking better of destroying something I depend so much on. Anyway, we are starting our new life, and I'm excited, but at the same time I already miss home.

There's just something about your hometown that feels right, that will always feel like, "This is where I belong." All your childhood memories are wrapped up in this town, you feel comfortable, and to step out of that comfort zone that you have surrounded yourself in is a big deal. I'm finding that I feel like nothing that bad could ever happen when you are in the town you love and surrounded by the people who love you. Like we're in some sort of bubble where we are. I know we need to step out... But sometimes I wonder why? I've started to remember a few little things that I sometimes forget about my childhood. Some things that I tend to take for granted by forgetting to remember they ever happened.

Josh and I were driving up to Olympia the other day and I wondered how many times I had taken that trip in my life. How many times have I seen those same trees and never paid any attention to how beautiful they are? Josh mentioned how beautiful everything was and said he'd never noticed before. We are only an hour and a half away, but not seeing those things on such a regular basis will be sad, but at the same time it will make us pay attention more.

I've come to realize how much I love life. I mean really love life, and sometimes I find myself overwhelmed by how many blessings big and small that I have had during my 21 years here. Little things like the turning color of the leaves. It's simple, but I love it. The bad sometimes feels like to much, but the good out weighs the bad most of the time. Life is beautiful.

So now Josh and I have to take on the task of learning to create new memories, our own memories. Memories that we can build our life together on. And I'm excited about all the new things and all the new possibilities to come. I'm welcoming the hard times along with the good times because I know life is so much sweeter when we know struggle. I'd like everything to be easy, but it never is.

So I'm determined to like being down here, and determined to do new things and love life more. We move into our apartment on Saturday. I'm so excited, but in the meantime I'm hanging out in this hotel room by myself. If you are ever in the area come visit! We would love, love, love to see you! I will keep everyone updated on our progress this week and so on. And hopefully soon I will be putting some pictures up! Have a wonderful day!


Thursday, October 23, 2008

7 Random Things

So I was tagged by Beka on her blog, luckily I check her blog when I get online because otherwise I wouldn't have seen it for weeks! So here goes.

1). I also hate when the shower curtain is left open. How hard is it to shut? Who wants to see all your stuff in your shower? I like the flow of the room when its shut. Such an easy way to make a room look cleaner.

2). I wish I could bake something cool every day. I wish I had the money to bake something cool every day.

3). If I could be a jewel theif and get away with it, I just might do it. Although, it's never as cool as they make it look in the movies.

4). If I could go into anyone's closet and where their clothes it would probably have to be Jackie Kennedy.

5). I'm trying to talk Josh into buying me an acoustic guitar for Christmas because I really want to learn to play. Yes, I should have listened to my mother when she suggested me learning ten years ago.

6). Right now I'm feeling completely uncreative and uninspired. There is too much other stuff going on. I don't remember the last time I wrote in my idea journal, and that's sad.

7). I hate most breakfast foods. I like bacon and omlettes but that's about as far as it goes. Cereal is okay too, but it has to be a specific kind.

I tag... Elizabeth Thacker, if she ever checks this:)

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Going Crazy (What We're Up To)

So, I've been a little scarce around these parts lately. Partially because of the lack of almost all forms of entertainment. No cable, no internet. I know, it's sad that I've come to that. Josh and I are spending almost 24 hours a day 7 days a week together and I really think we are on the verge of commiting a murder. Anyone in such a close vicinity would want to strangle even their best friend if you've continued to live like this for 2 and a half months. We do quite well, considering we spend nearly every waking moment together. Why is it though, that even if I do want some space I still don't want him to go and do anything without me? I must be crazy.

Why wouldn't I want some peace and quite from that ever continuing College football game on xbox that sounds in my ears while I'm trying to edit photos? And why wouldn't I like a view of an empty couch where my husband so eagerly takes position in front of the tv with that ridiculously intense look on his face like he just won the superbowl? Most days I want to pull my hair out, but no I still want him around. I guess after almost a year of marriage I still think he's beautiful and I still really do like him, even if he only gets up from the couch to eat Top Ramen and go to the bathroom.

Things have been pretty crazy around here for us lately. We spend almost as much time in the car as we do in the house. You should see our place, it looks like a hurricane came through. Boxes everywhere, more boxes now that we moved things out of Josh's parents place. I'm sure we could fashion some sort of cardboard mansion if we knew it would stand up well. It would be alot cheaper than our apartment, and with as many boxes as we have it would probably be the same size. Of course, there is all that crap, I mean valuables, that we have accumulated over the year of marriage.

We've found that we don't know whether we are coming or going and I can feel my anxiety rise and I have instant heartburn. I think I will have a small heart attack soon. Don't worry though, I'm young, so I should be able to pull through. Luckily though, there is a small light at the end of the tunnel. Josh will be starting a new job next friday, and we will be living in a hotel for a week! Our nomadic life resumes. We get to move into our cute new little apartment on the first of November. The prospect of getting to live in one place for a year excites me to no end. I'm already planning on where to hang things and what color to paint our 1 accent wall. I'm thinking something really cool...

The next obstacle? Alyssa finding a job... Nice. I've found that I'm not good at much. And I really don't think I have the patience to work at a mall during the holiday season. I'm thinking about something more full time, like answering phones in that sunny voice I hate so much. Or typing on the computer with my crazy typing skills that I learned from all those years of ICQ in Jr. High. No, Mavis Beacon typing software, you did not work, typing to that cute boy at school on ICQ did though. Professionals just really need to leave it up to the kids with crushes to learn how to type. Your silly "ASDFGHJKL" crap doesn't work. It just doesn't. Now for fun, I type on the keyboard while I'm listening to a song. Sad that I think that is fun, but is so much entertainment. So there is that, and what else I have not a clue. I'm not sure I'd be a good waitress, again, the patience thing. I can't stand people being mad at me if I get something wrong or I'm not fast enough with that. I have terrible balance when it comes to plates too, and if you've ever seen me, I only have the muscles I was born with. My brother continually tells me that I looked like a Jewish prisioner of the Auschwitz concentration camp when I was in highschool. He is right. I was certainly a beauty.

So, I'm on a quest to find something I'm good at, while making some money to help pay this insane rent on our tiny one bedroom apartment. The upside? I probably won't get stabbed walking out my front door and there is a tanning bed in the apartment complex, who can complain? A cancer bed I can visit every day at work! Will I go, probably not, but the thought that I could makes me happy.

So this is where we are: driving eachother crazy, stressed to near heart attacks, poor and getting poorer (not a word), jobless (as of now) and loving eachother every minute. It's good to be young isn't it?

Have a beautiful evening, and remember to love life no matter how stressful!!


Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Completely At Peace... If Only For Just A Few Minutes

Lately things have been so hectic, I feel like I'm a chicken running around with my head cut off. I love it, really. That feeling of adrenaline (will I get everything done I need to do today)? Usually, the answer is no. Today is no different. There always seems to be a reason why something hasn't gotten done. Today it was, "I can't get my Session Guide emailed to my clients for this weekend, and the ones next week because my computer is in the shop, and I can't remember what I wrote in the first one. But I did look for apartments, check emails, write my client, go to the doctor (boo), and have dinner with my husband, my brother and mom. I have my priorities straight. Is the kitchen clean? No, is the living room picked up? Sort of. The paper the cat tore up all over has been vacuumed, but the vacuum is still sitting against the wall where I'm sure it will take up residence for a few days. I'm not strong enough to lift if out of the living room, and up into the hall. No, Josh won't do it either... So there it will sit. :)

Yesterday was the busiest day I've had so far this week. I flew to Boise at 8:45 A.M. finished cleaning the apartment, and was back on a plane flying home at 8:00 P.M. I flew at the two best times to fly. My flight home was probably the best flight I've been on. I was exhausted, my feet were killing me, and I was irritated at the three guys who had been sitting behind me at the gate because they had been talking about the opinion of their vote in the upcoming election. There must have been 20 of us hovered around the t.v. at the gate watching the Presidential Debate. I cared what Obama and McCain had to say, not Joe blow behind me. I just wanted to get my flight over, and get home to see my husband. I am so tired of flying that I would walk to Boise if it didn't take me a decade. Needless to say, I was in an alright mood, but that could have changed at the drop of a hat. My head was frantic figuring out what had to come next, when I could get to sleep, and what had to happen tomorrow.

We took off from the tarmac, my favorite part of the flight, and I peered out the window at the sky. I love looking down at the houses, all the lights. Everything seems so small. It give you a sense of greatness. What we do is important, but at the same time our lives in this immediate space is so small. And when I saw the sky, my breath was taken away. I have seen my fair share of gorgeous sunsets, but this one had to be the top. I've seen it in Monet's "Dusk" painting, but have never experienced it myself. It's a sight that is impossible to tear yourself away from. It's my favorite Monet painting! Something about the reds and blues and the peacefulness of it all calmed me and spoke peace into my heart. All of the worries I had went away and the only thing I heard were the sweet words of John Hiatt coming from my ipod. I was completely enveloped. I could live those few moments forever.

I had this odd sense that no matter what I get done and don't, or what happens during the day God will make sure everything is just as it should be. I felt like this sunset was a secret for me, something only I saw, anyone else could see it, if only they had peeked out their windows to see. It was a reminder of saying to me, "Look at what I have created, and look at what I have given to you... All of this is for you." It's for all of us really. What an amazing gift.Sometimes I find it hard to stop and look around with so many worries, and so many tasks to do. I'm glad I took the time to look.

Have a blessed night. Remember to take a few minutes to enjoy what God gave us!


Monday, October 6, 2008

Just Because

4 things I did today
1. Went to the doctor to have my ears cleaned out:(
2. Went to Olympia with my mom: got new pants and a purse.
3. Finally made the apple pie I've been putting off making
4. Had dinner with Josh's parents.

4 things on my to do list
1. Take two flights tomorrow one to boise to close on our apartment, and one home after everything is done.
2. Figure out how to get through tomorrow's schedule.
3. Plan for this weekend's session.
4. Look for a new apartment.

4 of my guiltiest pleasures
1. Stalking blogs that I love while I should be doing other things.
2. Watching Reba and Golden Girls.
3. Cuddling our kitty Cairo even when she tries to run away.
4. Obsessively planning for sessions.

4 random facts about me
1. I love everything about magazines. The way they feel, smell, everything.
2. I love going for drives
3. I think about things to write about before I blog.
4. I love Vanilla Chai Teas from All Wrapped Up!
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